• Clean the garbage disposal  The garbage disposal is like Rodney Dangerfield, it just don’t get no respect.  You don’t even think about it until it stops working…which it will do right after Christmas dinner.  Put most of the food into trash bags or compost if possible.  Keep fiber-y foods and grease away from the sink.  Put in ice cubes and a cup of rock salt for a few spins to clean it.  

• Snake the sewer line  This season is D-Day for your house’s plumbing system.  All kinds of greases and bones and junk passing through.  It’s no coincidence that there are so many stories of people having horrible sewer backups on Christmas Eve.  Having a plumber snake the main line should cost less than $200 and an hour, and that is worth the cost to keep you from dreaming of a Brown Christmas (I’m sorry, did I go too far on that one?)

• Keep the home fires from burning   Make sure your fire extinguisher is charged (remember? that fire extinguisher that you have in your kitchen?)  by looking for the gauge needle to be in the green.  If it is more than a couple years old, just replace it. And make sure it isn’t all the way in the back of the sink cabinet behind thirty bottles of Windex.  That won’t help much when it’s go time.  

• Love on the toilet  If this season is D-Day for your house’s plumbing system, then the toilet is ground zero.  I know you are used to its quirkiness, but visitors won’t be.  Make sure the bowl is bolted securely to the floor.  Make sure the seat bolts are tight (yes, you may have to touch them).  If the flushing isn’t quite as robust as it once was, you could replace the flapper valve or the entire mechanism.  (Then when you give up, you can call me and I’ll send over my wonderful plumber to fix it right).  

• Water the tree  According to the National Christmas Tree Association (yes, that’s really a thing)  you should make a fresh cut ½” up from the base before setting the tree in the stand.  Check the water level daily.  Turn off the lights whenever you leave or go to bed.  And never try to burn a Christmas tree in a fireplace.  It will be the last thing you ever burn in there.  

• Clean the chimney  Do I really need to explain this one?  Used chimneys get dirty.  Dirty chimneys cause fires.  I’ve got a guy if you need one.

• Clean the gutters  This one may seem a little strange since the fall is long gone, but if your house is anything like the others I have been visiting, there are plenty of pesky leaves still lurking inside just ready to turn into ice dams once that first good snow hits.  

• Replace dead light bulbs   Your visitors aren’t as familiar with your house’s quirks as you are–that loose brick on the second step, that missing handrail…a good way to help is to make sure the entrances and stairways have plenty of light.  (and you could also just fix the brick and the handrail).

• Child proof the home   Your visitors may have children that aren’t used to the samurai sword collection you keep on the wall, or the Ming dynasty vases you keep on the coffee table.  Take a walk through the house and prepare–moving breakables out of reach, securing cabinets with don’t touches inside, and closing doors to forbidden rooms (remember those?  those were the best).  

Hope that helps.  I’ve got more home holiday tips, but you’ll just have to wait for Valentine’s Day!